-PHucker- [entries|friends|calendar] lazytrackstar11 [ website | myspace ] [ userinfo | livejournal userinfo ] [ calendar | livejournal calendar ]

What have they done to our fair sister? Ravaged and plundered and raped her and bit her [01 May 2007|07:34pm] [ mood | how come? ] [ music | The Beatles - You've Got To Hide Your Love Away ] Arabian Princess I'd like to practice free love with an arabian princess. See in a cartoon like dream, my arabian princess. A veil to hide a future bride to the sun under which the moonlight shines. Two lights too bright for such magic eyes. The finest cloth to clothe, the world saved for one, arabian princess girl. A walk so high for the clouds to hold, a murderous mind of hot and cold. Stop the train and let her down, crown her thoughts with sexless nouns. Only break the cork for her and let the bottle pour for her, my arabian princess. Flowers for the field make it the only place to go, I only wish that I could show the roses that their beauty does not know of my arabian princess. She can lay and stand and sit some too, not much different than any lady can do, but it's her and she knows it and I know it too, that any girl who sees her wishes to be an arabian princess too. With thoughts so far down from a mountains peak she knows her meaning, choosing when to speak, but when she chooses her voice so sweetly sounds. And believe me when I tell you my heart it pounds. Anytime my arabian princess is around. Mexico Continued There's people all around me Only they're louder than I am Or than I choose to be I sit right next to the girl whose right track Runs head on down towards the wrong station If the station is even standing when she arrives The malnourished brain sits forward of me Looking on, probably out to the future somewhere She has two hand prints on her back Someone must've pushed her And to think, she wanted to stop the violence The guy next to me doesn't appear to hate violence Or care to stop it Judging by the army crest laid down across his breast But his eyes just drop, below the ocean's waves Locked beneath the stage And upon the stage is the golden girl. flavoured with golden hair and a hint of naievity. But she stands on stage nonetheless. If only we'd have gotten to her first. We may have flavoured her differently, more naturally. She approves of the man in front of her. It was just how she was brought up. "Well I don't have to understand as long as I'm polite." Oh but some can't understand how to be polite, so they don't ever end up in the right place. If any one place can even hold some of them, The arabian princess and her friend, and the mother, watching over us, but more over herself than anybody really. "I don't have to understand if I'm not included." And she wasn't included, except for the occasional eight hour work day and maybe a plate placed down on the floor to see how much it takes for her to beg. She didn't beg long, because everyone else just sitting around with a face joined the choir and began in singing a new song. It was the Star Spangled Banner, I know I'd heard it before, but they claimed I hadn't only to continue the verse. It was a long verse, not consisting of much more than the words included. They only were included to lull its listeners ears into thinking they were really asleep. The rumbling of Mr. Big Neck's car crash voice is said to have something to do with their awakening. Now that you're awake I'd like to put you down to rest. No, don't worry, you're not sick, well, not too sick, but don't worry the news tells me cancer is just a part of life now, so Get well soon if that's what you aim to do. If not, let me know how things turn out. I mean I know how it'll turn out, But I'd just like to hear your point of view. Drift Away

Imagine all the people sharing all the world [02 Apr 2007|09:46pm] [ mood | peaceful ] [ music | John Lennon - Imagine ] "Live as if you were to die tomorrow, learn as if you were to live forever." -Gandhi- Outside its raining And the nights feel like I do I've always found it better When my eyes did not fall upon you So please start walkin And I'll start walkin too Don't look back There ain't nothin left behind The puddle have soaked up the streetlights And my footsteps have gotten hard My eyes are lost in the sky I'm waiting for the weatherman to play his next card As I smile and I laugh With a simple disregard Don't look back There ain't nothin left behind Ain't it funny how you smile When you run your life a crooked mile And you're hoping for a tomorrow That never comes in style Well we can wake up to a sunset With unlimited tomorrows Making up our histories From others that we borrow Don't look back There ain't nothin left behind Drift Away

The country music station plays soft, But there's nothing really nothing to turn off [19 Mar 2007|08:19pm] [ mood | peaceful ] [ music | Bob Dylan- Visions Of Johanna ] Rest Peacefully Forever James G. Rago Good Man So I thought for awhile today about what I'd like to do for a living and honestly I couldn't think of anything, because I would much rather just live for a living. I even searched online for awhile for career aptitude test type things, found a bunch, filled them out, and realized just how rediculously inaccurate they were, especially when the one of em told me my first choice should be in education. I don't want to teach in schools and I don't want to spend way too much money attending school which is not helping me to do anything because I don't even know what I'd like to study anymore, if anybody learns something from me outside of school then I guess I've accomplished something, in my mind anyways. I might start focusing more of my time on writing and see if that can take me where I want to go. Heaven And Hell The sky is grey, The air is dead Something’s happening in my head Lie awake, Lie asleep, Lie apart From those that keep smiles From faces meant for better places Germany, France, London too Spinning and spinning The world out of you There’s not but one thread Left to wrap round the earth To quilt what is seen, thought, and heard Our rite since birth A birth that raises A life that descends Until the crowd that you’re keeping Are no longer you’re friends Estranged by the strange And let in by the few Only those who find life Stranger than you (do) They dwell on the mountain tops Or work in the candy shops Knowing that nothing ever stops Just continues to start Start from the end Please tell me again Which way is up Which way is down Everything’s sideways When you live in my town A town that is crooked, misshapen and sad Falling off its foundations Which most never had Had we gotten there sooner We’d still have been late To watch more and more of us Swallowed by fate Fate that binds Fate that makes weary All caught in its path Fate that ensures no one Can escape from its wrath Wrath that wrought sparkles And sounds in the sky Tearing down clouds So no man can spy Or even begin to believe All that is grown, All that is seen All that is you, All that is me Is all which they thieve Be this the light Meant to shine before we You must ask yourself I know I’d rather leave Leave like the fall When the winter draws near Leave you with your heaven Your hell, and your fear Drift Away

I don't know why you say goodbye, I say hello [08 Mar 2007|03:59pm] [ mood | free ] [ music | The Beatles - Hello, Goodbye ] Well, I was asked to write a poem in one of my classes today. It was to be an "I am" poem. But what are people, except for what they do. Or so that's how the majority of people themselves think, including most of my class. But what are we really? Do you even know? I am of the strawberry fields I am the son of no man I am what you see all around you I am everywhere under the sun I am me I am you I am the feet of Achilles I am the wheels of anything that moves I am visionary I am a shooting star I am what I am I am what you long to be I am free, to think, to act, to be Myself And I don't even like school. I don't really want a career/job. So I don't really want to spend my time sitting in classes, learning about things that odds are I don't care about, or aren't going to help me at all in the future. So we'll see just how much longer me and school continue to coincide. Everything And Everybody I find myself here, right now, even tonight The vase and the candle of time Make the water like wine It makes a world of difference AND Everybody's just gonna hang out Everybody's just gonna act out Are we talkin the whole world? Ohe we're talkin everybody THE WHOLE WORLD Nothing ever ends until you make it end Don't worry everything's make believe Everything's make believe All simple things in life happen again So when's it gonna end? so when's it gonna end The world is about to change speed at our command Fast or slow? Whichever way we wanna make it go We're gonna live in the endless summer time A place where I could be myself all day Oh how softly things explode Yes, how softly things explode AND Everybody's just gonna hang out Everybody's just gonna act out Are we talkin the whole world? Ohe we're talkin everybody THE WHOLE WORLD Nothing ever ends until you make it end Don't worry everything's make believe Everything's make believe 2 Almost|Drift Away

Nothing You Can Do But You Can Learn How To Be You In Time, It's Easy [05 Mar 2007|06:47pm] [ mood | What's next? ] [ music | The Beatles- Strawberry Fields Forever ] Been writing some lately, and this past weekend was the best one i've had in probably a year, good times, good ideas, great laughs, good company, and most of all, the best craic I've ever had. I'd like to hang out with everyone I did this weekend on a regular basis. Early Sunday Morning Rain The crowd of people sat and stared I stared too, but with a diverted gaze The lights went out in New Orleans Leaving them to stumble through the haze And they were lost without the glow Searching for something that the shadows bring But there was nothing really there at all to find Nobody knew me anymore We blew our kisses in the air that day The cars raced by the racing cars That went the other way And they drove the world insane Hoping that something would help slow them down But there was nobody anymore sane enough to help A cigarette lay at my lips It burned a hole right through the atmosphere Nobody seemed to notice that they could no longer breathe And the city began to melt so that by mid day It appeared to have never been here at all But we will always have our fatal memories And the early Sunday morning rain went on Close Your Eyes Just turn your head and Watch life slowly degrade all around you As our neighbors dance out their own scene We're the only car left on the road And it's stalling But don't you know There's nowhere else I'd rather be So they sold the scenery For better landscape Do you remember when we were young and in love Nothing had to end Sad American boy, sad American girl Gathered together at the sad American dance Bodies weeping in their movements So close your eyes And wait inside For an hour or two Then we'll take a step out into What we've all been waiting for Mrs. auburn hair why don't you come lead me down the road We'll place our eyes where only we can see Lets sing a song to the sun And when it comes We'll ride on it til dawn Looking back across our sunset No matter how often you look at a clock It's still the same time I just want you to take me home to the night So close your eyes And wait inside For an hour or two Then we'll take a step out into What we've all been waiting for Mrs. auburn hair why don't you come lead me down the road We'll place our eyes where only we can see We are allowed vast beautiful skies To sink our sorrows in as time floats by An' everything that is ever undone in history Happens right before our eyes I can feel the underlying mystery behind us all Through the tragedy of our young lives Discovering what it meant to be free Choose a band/artist and answer only in song TITLES by that band: The Beatles Are you male or female: I Am The Walrus Describe yourself: A Day In The Life How do some people feel about you: Got To Get You Into My Life How do you feel about yourself: Getting Better Describe your ex girlfriend/boyfriend: Lucy In The Sky With Diamonds Describe your current girlfriend/boyfriend: Martha My Dear Describe where you want to be: Strawberry Fields Forever Describe what you want to be: Revolution Describe how you live: With A Little Help From My Friends Describe how you love: All You Need Is Love Share a few words of wisdom: Come Together 1 Almost|Drift Away

We're both just one too many mornings and a thousand mile behind [28 Dec 2006|07:58pm] [ mood | let's go out and do something ] [ music | Joan Baez- Walkin' Down The Line ] Rest Peacefully Forever December 18th 2006 Molly Clark 11 and 3/4 years I love you Molly! If you have any special memories of Molly, please, share them. 7 Almost|Drift Away

Rock Me Mama Like A Wagon Wheel [28 Nov 2006|10:40pm] [ mood | fuck ] [ music | Bob Dylan- Idiot Wind ] Well things have been up and down lately. Bills game with Rebs for her birthday was fun. Been real busy and working a lot. Christmas break will be great and a much needed rest. I decided to take a break during my homework and do something I haven't done since June 7th 2005; a livejournal survey I used to fill out all the time due to boredom. Enjoy. SECTiON 1 + your name: Robert Thomas Clark + your gender: Male + age: 18 + height: 5'10.5" + hair color: Blonde on blonde + eye color: Painfully blue + fears: Nothing SECTiON 2 [ HAVE YOU EVER ] + fallen off the bed?: Yes + fallen for a relative?: Sorry I'm not into that + had plastic surgery?: No + broke someone's heart?: I doubt it + had your heart broken?: Yes + had a dream come true?: No + done something you regret?: I don't regret anything + cheated on a test?: It's called highschool + broken a body part?: My wrist SECTiON 3 [CURRENTLY] + wearing: PJ pants and bluejays shirt + listening to: My favorite western "Death Rides A Horse" + chewing: Nothing + feeling: Shitty, worn out, disgusted + reading: I need to start reading again + located: Living room + chatting with: Nobody + watching: "Death Rides A Horse" + should REALLY be: Doing more homework SECTiON 4 [ DO YOU... ] + brush your teeth?: Every morning + like anybody?: No + have any piercings?: No + drive?: Yes + believe in Santa Claus?: No + ever get off the computer?: Yes SECTiON 5 [ FRiENDS ] + do you belong to a crew?: Not anymore + do you hang out with the opposite sex?: Yes + do you consider yourself popular?: No + do you trust your friends?: Yes + are you a good friend?: I try to be + can you keep a secret?: Yes SECTiON 6 [ THE LAST PERSON YOU...] + hugged: Crazy Mary + talked to on the phone: Big Bob + yelled at: I don't remember + turned down: Nobody SECTiON 7 [ PERSONAL ] + What do you want to be when you grow up?: History Teacher + What was the worst day of your life?: I don't know + What has been the best day of your life?: I'm really not sure + What comes first in your life?: Happiness, Fun + Do you have a boyfriend/girlfriend?: No + If you had an extra set of eyes where would you put them?: My back + What do you usually think about before you go to bed?: How shitty things are or how I can't fall asleep SECTION 8 [ FAVOURITE . . . ] + Song: Sink, Florida, Sink- Against Me! + Movie: Pirates Of The Carribean: Curse Of The Black Pearl + Band: Bob Dylan + Store: Walgreens + Relative: Sister + Vacation Spot: Now that I think back, Canada was really nice, but I am looking forward to Findlay, but Nashville has to be number 1 + Fruit: Strawberries + Candy: Anything + Holiday: Halloween + Day of the Week: Saturday + Colour: Brown + Magazine: None + Name for a Girl: Cecilia or Johanna + Name for a Boy: Charlie SECTiON 9 [ DO YOU . . .] + Like to give hugs?: Yes + Sleep with or without clothes off?: Boxers only + Prefer black or blue pens?: Black + Dress up on Halloween?: Yes, but I worked this year and didn't have time to change for Schlechtdog's party + Like to travel?: Love it + Sleep on your side, tummy, or back?: All of them + Think you're attractive?: Yes + Want to marry?: Eventually + Have a goldfish?: No + Ever have the falling dream?: No, but I've had some fucked up dreams + Have stuffed animals?: My old ones are in the attic I think + Go on vacation?: Yes SECTiON 10 [ WHAT DO YOU THINK ABOUT . . .] + Abortion: Pro Choice + Eating Disorders: Gross + Tattoos: Can't wait to get one + Piercings: Nose and belly piercings look attractive on a girl, piercings are dumb for guys + Make-up: Don't care + Guys: Fun to hang out with + Girls: Fun to hang out with 1 Almost|Drift Away

It can'y be this way ev'rywhere [11 Nov 2006|04:38pm] [ mood | calm ] [ music | Bob Dylan- Most Likely You Go Your Way (And I'll Go Mine) ] Lots of fun has been had lately. I saw two pump*train shows, evan greer was awesome, tomorrow the gallows was awesome and so was pump*train. Visited maz at UB with andrew and bob I'm glad I got to see fleisch on thurs, i also got to see tramp, steve, jen, jon, maz, j-dog, and the at mighty i saw ian, sean walsh, dan delapenta, sam mendola, and i was with peas. Tons of people, tons of fun, i can't wait for thanksgiving and christmas break, it's gonna be fuckin great. Can't wait to register for next semester classes. Well call me up if you wanna chill, i don't work next tues through fri, and friday i get to see rise against which is gonna kick ass! Peace 5 Almost|Drift Away

Try To Set The Night On Fire [26 Oct 2006|05:11pm] [ mood | somewhere over the rainbow ] [ music | The Doors- Light My Fire ] I was planning on having a Halloween fire this saturday but I can't because my backyard is too wet. Evan Greer (Boston MA. Riotfolk Records.) & Pump Train (Buffalo Punk Rock,Folkpunk) Sat. Oct. 28 164 Washington Kenmore NY 6 pm. Free/Donations I will be at this show instead, all should attend, gonna be fun! Things have been decent. Tschus! 2 Almost|Drift Away

I'll do just fine on my own, with my cigarettes and this old dirt road [11 Oct 2006|10:34pm] [ mood | look at that tongue ] [ music | The Wreckers- Cigarettes ] I had a nice long weekend I got to hang out with Biggy and Peas on Sunday, we shot roman candles at each other lol. Hung out with Andrew, we always manage to have a swell time. Saw Sam LAduca for awhile too which was awesome. "Here I got you a sponge." Congrats Maz, you finally did it, we were the only two who made it all the way, feels nice don't it? Very nice ceremony as well. Talked to my brother Davey on the phone for an hour the other day which was really nice, and I can't wait til he comes home in December. Visited Big Spice at Alfred Monday night. Alfred is the shittiest town there is, absolutely nothing to do. I'm surprised I didn't get a speeding ticket though seeing as I never went slower than 50, and most of the time was around 80 or 90. Things have been doin lately, hopefully me and Peas will be able to have a good chat with Brunger about our inquiry. Lookin up rather than down I guess, hopefully I'll reach the stars soon enough. Until Then, PHucker 2 Almost|Drift Away

Fall Children Fill The Streets At Dusk, At Last, It All Will Begin [04 Oct 2006|05:30pm] [ mood | this day so hallowed ] [ music | AFI- Fall Children ] Last night I went for a walk with A-kep which was a very nice time. I probably walked about 4 miles maybe more, and I think I might go for a walk again tonight, very relaxing. Been too wet for a fire unfortunately. I steal bulk candy. Rise Against in November, gonna be good, still gotta get my ticket, who's goin? I should start running again and doing some kind of working out. Apple picking was just wondeful saturday with Devious and Johnny Gwace. Probably gonna go somewhere new this weekend and get some more apples, Becker Farms perhaps. I need to start writing again, it has been far too long. I have been doing good on my English papers so that's a good sign for me switching to an English major. I need a Big Spice fire and to get my head taken off by a cantelope and my chest and back bruised by tomatoes, peppers, and perhaps even potatoes. Fuck the beach boys, I don't wish they were all California girls. In fact, there is a wonderful country song by Gretchen Wilson entitled "Ain't You Glad We Ain't All California Girls," and yes I'm glad not all of them are. My favorite holiday is coming up, I can't wait. 1000 good intentions, lost translation, lost forever. I don't have a backup plan, this is all that I am. Not much else except gimme a call to hang out, you know the number. Also, I forgot to mention, Jesus Christ kills pigs, it's in the Bible. Love, PHucker 6 Almost|Drift Away

Well Her Skirt It Swayed As The Guitar Played [24 Sep 2006|06:49pm] [ mood | sweet dreams ] [ music | Bob Dylan- One Of Us Must Know (Sooner Or Later) ] Well I feel like updating, maybe more people will start up again. Lots of things been goin on lately. Canisius is just lovely, lots of old friends and a few new ones. Classes aren't bad, thinking of switching my major from history education to english education though. I had a nice week of my parents being gone. Conneaut, Ohio with Devious on thursday was nice as well. It is probably the most beautiful town there is. Findley lake with my parents was nice too, and I guess I will be spending lots of time there in the future seeing as my parents bought a huge trailer and seasonal campsite there. Should be fun, nice place, good for fires. I'm thinkin of havin some fires soon as my backyard drys out, anyone interested, I know you are, it's been a long time. Also, anyone still playin frisbe on sundays at hamilton. I need exercise, and I'm less busy now during school than I was this summer. I am also thinking of having a halloween fire/party at my house, let me know if that sounds like a good time. Also, I need to get hit with some vegetables, real hard. Call me up, I get bored often and need to do some more interesting things 289-2969. Love, PHucker Bob 4 Almost|Drift Away

I Was So Much Older Then, I'm Younger Than That Now [29 Aug 2006|07:35pm] [ mood | i don't know man ] [ music | Rise Against- Everchanging ] The scars they don't come from runnin' But from all those times I stayed An' the lives I've tried to leave behind Are the streets on which I walk at night You come to me like autumn days Right about when the shadows fall Streetlights casting, making me tall Taller than my fears were I always thought there'd be someone who was gonna save me When I fall Someone who was gonna save me, save me From it all Fireworks are falling all around us Only we've never turned to see Words keep spilling from out of us Though they always seem to be just a way to fill the silence I lost everything I had to hold on to The stars in the sky are gone too I'm just old roads tied to old hearts That sometime so long ago, fell apart I always thought there'd be someone who was gonna save me When I fall Someone who was gonna save me, save me From it all 1 Almost|Drift Away

CONDOLEEEEEEEEEZA!!!!!!! [15 Aug 2006|02:30pm] [ mood | happy ] [ music | Dear Shithead- My Name's Randy(AndIDontKnowWhoTheFuckYouAre) ] Holy fuckin shit! These past couple weeks have just been fuckin incredible, especially last night I'm gonna miss you BIG SPICE!!!!!! I definately saw the best concert of my life last night, a brilliant 2 hour Dear Shithead performance, in which I sung along to every song. Such a great fuckin night and with the greatest people in the world too. I managed to meet a fuckin incredible girl as well a few weeks ago>>>>MY COMPUTER IS GOIN FUCKIN NUTS> WELL ANYWAys she even is able to put up with me talking about slugs for a good @) minutes> i am glad i have my bestie rose to talk to again too mraa and on that note my name is randy but i don"t know who the fuck you are 5 Almost|Drift Away

I've Gone To Watch The Sunset Somewhere Else [20 Jul 2006|02:17pm] [ mood | conscious ] [ music | Lucero- That Much Further West ] There are no trials inside the gates of Eden. Your feelings of royalty don't last very long after you meet the people of a strange place, so you hide your pain, discomfort, everything that turns your heart black, deep in the woods, only to stumble upon them years later. But you know you subconsciously wanted to go back to those woods, something more needed to be layed to rest, and it was, at a cost. 20 some odd hours to be even more productive. I'm not sleepy, and there is no place I'm going to. Being in one place isn't as bad as you might think, especially when you always have the option to leave anyways. You think you've stayed for one thing, but you haven't, it was something else. As long as you can find a something else, there's really no reason to do anything, go anywhere, why not just sit down, rest, wherever you want, anywhere in the world. The Sun Sets In My Backyard -PHucker- I slept all day again Woke up at 2 in the afternoon Legs hanging over the side of my bed Already walking towards the sunset I hope it pours rain tonight Making all those letters run I'll understand if you're too affraid You'll just never get what I've done And I hope that you're still affraid When those letters turn the night to day They're the ones that make up the words Always seem to drive us away I know I'll be layin' awake tonight Don't know if I'll fall asleep this time Head dangling over the edge of my bed Ready to hit the floor And I hope that you're still affraid When those letters turn the night to day They're the ones that make up the words Always seem to drive us away 1 Almost|Drift Away

And Now Something Has Kept Me Here Too Long [10 Jul 2006|01:10am] [ mood | fuck man ] [ music | Rise Against- Faint Resemblance ] I don't have much to say anymore. I've said it all so many times and I just can't take saying it all again. I have spent just about half of each day recently sleeping, and I must say I don't have a problem with it, even though one could say it's a waste of a day, the night is better anyways. I have seen the perfect lives and scenarios play through my head; I have woken up since then. I watched tv the other day, until I realized what I was doing, and I can honestly say I like the book I'm reading quite a bit. Downtown is such a beautiful place, especially my favorite spot. This dying city still has a lot to offer, so go look for it. I really would like to see the sunset over those three rivers. So I've written a little more lately. The Most Beautiful Spot In Buffalo -PHucker- Your tears on my shirt Your body in my arms Something more was meant than what was said I kept you warm all night I kept you safe all night You got it in your head I'm gonna be gone forever I helped you see the stars We helped each other find ourselves through the clouds There's nothing to be affraid of There's no reason to be scared Of all the smallest movements that we make You just gotta learn to take what's given to you Because it ain't your fault There's no cause to lose your confidence I helped you see the stars We helped each other find ourselves through the clouds Stitches And Seams -PHucker- How is the movie going to end? When will this song be over? What hides these feelings behind your eyes tonight? Something is shaking Is it your voice trembling? Has someone finally answered all your prayers? It takes just a few words to unravel everything apart You'll need a heartful more to stitch it back together But you're never gonna get No you're never gonna get How two extreme opposites Can pull together at one end Who'll hold you up when you're all alone? Where'll you get the blanket to wrap your dreams in? Which stars are you gonna wish upon when clouds cover the sky? Something is bursting Is it your heart beating? Have your prayers been abandoned? So where've you been making your stitches? And just which seams will you let burst? No you're never gonna get No you're never gonna get Oh I hope someday you'll get How two extreme opposites Can pull together at one end 3 Almost|Drift Away

As Long As You Have Something That You Call Control [29 Jun 2006|11:12am] [ mood | Colliding ] [ music | Pump*Train- Something That You Call Control ] SO THIS ANNOUNCEMENT IS GETTING OUT REAL LATE, BUT OH WELL. THE THIRD AND FINAL OUTDOOR TRACK PARTY WILL BE HELD THIS SATURDAY, JULY 1ST AT 2PM AT MY HOUSE, 7 MARIAN DRIVE. MY DAD WILL COOK SOME CRISPY WEINERS, AND I ASK THAT YOU PLEASE BRING EITHER POP OR A BAG OF CHIPS OR SOMETHING. I NEED TO PUT TOGETHER A FIRE PIT FOR THE OCCASION, AND DO A FEW OTHER THINGS AS WELL, LET ME KNOW IF YOU WANT TO HANG OUT AND HELP. MY NUMBER IS 289-2969 IF THERE ARE ANY QUESTIONS, TELL ALL THE PEOPLE YOU KNOW ON TRACK, OR WOULD CARE TO SEE AT THE PARTY. THANK YOU. 8 Almost|Drift Away

I've Gone To Count The Stars Somewhere Else [25 Jun 2006|01:35am] [ mood | tired ] [ music | Pump*Train- A Place That Feels Like Home ] If only I knew where to begin. From the end of school until now, I'm glad everything happened the way it did. It helped me to make more sense of things, and even accept and enjoy some of them. I never knew anybody could just stare for hours on end at times, until I started doing it. It's been a time to read, and a time to write, unfortunately i can't put what i've written in here because it should only be seen by me and one other person who I don't think I am ready to show. I didn't need to read that book a second time through, it was better off going with you, and i hope you're reading it tonight under the stars in Cleveland, because I know you made it there today. Right now, there is nothing better than the most beautiful spot in Buffalo. This month is going to be a big one, hopefully I'll be able to tell so much and be able to make a few big decisions. There are a handfull of people that I need to spend all my time with, and I hope they're willing to do the same. I wish that sometimes that people just fuckin got it, they actually understood, but I have been proved wrong too many times. Drift Away

You're Gonna Fuck It Up [08 Jun 2006|10:36pm] [ mood | tired ] [ music | Against Me!- Sink, Florida, Sink ] Well, I find it hard to choose all these things I have to say right now. I'll just have to see where I end up after all the words stop coming. I guess I'll start by talking about highschool, most likely more about this year. Honestly, it is so hard for me to believe that I made it, especially as who I am now. The people I've met, the friends I've made, and the ones I grew apart from. This year, well, I'd have to say it was the best year of highschool. I enjoyed so many times with so many great friends, had some good times with a few girls along the way too, but for some reason I always knew I'd end up here. I shouldn't have been on outdoor track this year, and I still have that feeling I've had for so long now, I should've been getting ready. I have realized what stopped me, but I honestly don't think it's going to stop me much longer. I can only hope to be wrong this time, and if I'm not, well, then I am going to do some of the hardest things of my life. For those who I have become such great friends with, I know you will always be there for me. For those who I have recently met, I am hard to get to know, and that's my fault. For those who I have drifted away from, I have and will continue to be there for you, so come to me if you ever need to talk, because I will be here for you. Honsetly, the only good thing about senior year, meeting some of the greatest people ever who I never knew were out there, and growing so close to so many others. Maybe it's best for me that I don't have any memories written down in a yearbook, I don't know yet. Tomorrow should play a large part in determining my future, and maybe where it'll be. I shouldn't be going to prom, I shouldn't be going to graduation, but as of now I am going to both. I need to get rid of this feeling, being torn apart inside is worse than any physical pain I have ever known, or will ever know, worse than a third degree burn, worse than a broken wrist, worse than all of that bullshit. I feel old, I feel tired. Underneath the starlight Our burning hearts kept us warm Maybe it still means something But my hope got in my way And where have all these dreams gone Did they get lost in your eyes Or are they rising somewhere Up with the Nashville sun 3 Almost|Drift Away

[25 May 2006|08:51pm] [ mood | Fuckin ? man ] [ music | Against Me!- Slurring The Rythms ] I'M JUST KIDDING YOU -WHAT CAN I EVEN SAY:- IT'S NOT EVEN THAT I WANT HIGHSCHOOL TO END, IT'S THAT I NEED IT TO END, SO I CAN BE REJUVENATED. -WALKING IS NICE:- I HAVE BEEN WALKING MORE LATELY, AND I'M UNDERSTANDING AGAIN JUST WHY I USED TO WALK EVERYWHERE. I WILL KEEP THIS UP. -TRACK:- I WILL START OFF BY SAYING, NOBODY FUCKIN COMMENT SAYING, WELL, THINK ABOUT ALL THE FRIENDS YOU MADE AND THE FUN TIMES YOU HAD, THAT JUST WON'T BE APPRECIATED, UNLESS IT IS SOMETHING SPECIFIC TO ME AND YOU. I FAILED, I HAD ALL THE OPPORTUNITY IN THE WORLD, AND I FAILED. I NEVER REACHED 40 FEET, I NEVER REACHED PAST FUCKIN 37' 7.5". I LOVE YOU GUYS, THE TEAM WAS NICE THIS YEAR, AND JUST THE LETDOWN I WISHED WOULDN'T HAPPEN. THE ONLY THING I CAN SAY , TO SOME OF YOU, YOU KNOW WHO YOU ARE, I LOVE YOU. -ENGLISH:- I HAVEN'T STARTED MY RESEARCH PAPER, I GUESS IT'S NICE WE HAVE UNTIL TUESDAY, AND THAT I HAVE ONE LAST BIG ESCAPE TO PULL OFF AT THE LAST MINUTE. SHOULD BE INTERESTING. -INJURY:- BRING IT THE FUCK ON!!!!!!!!!! I WON'T LET IT STOP ME, FUCKIN SPRAINED WRIST, SHITTY FUCKED UP KNEES, I WON'T LET YOU STOP ME FROM RUNNING THIS SUMMER, NOTHING WILL. -SHITTIEST WEEKEND EVER:- I GET THE PLEASURE OF WORKING 27 HOURS THIS WEEKEND, SO THE FEW WHO WISH TO HANG OUT WITH ME, CALL ME ANYTIME AFTER 10. I WONDER WHEN I SHOULD START THE ENGLISH PAPER. I WONDER IF I WILL MAKE IT THROUGH THE WEEKEND INJURY FREE, AND STILL ABLE TO STAND, OR THINK. -WISH YOU WERE HERE:- I REALLY DO. IT'S GONNA HAPPEN ONE OF THESE DAYS. JUST KEEP ON SMILING, JUST KEEP ON SAYING, EVERYTHING'S GONNA BE ALRIGHT. -MORE TO COME:- MUCH MORE TO COME VERY SOON, HOPEFULLY MY WRITING WILL BE AT THE TOP OF ITS GAME THAT DAY. -PHucker Bob:- (Untitled) -PHucker Bob- We spray painted our freedoms on these years Held together by chewing gum and rubber bands After all it was my time and Not for one minute did I stop, not even after it broke You used to carry me too much And so tonight, I need to walk All the time spent counting down And the hours spent in front of myself Cannot compare to these feeling I've got I ain't never gonna get outta here You used to carry me too much And so tonight, I need to walk For a long while I dreamt of it I reached for every star in the sky But as the last car drove by It's to the streets I say goodnight You used to carry me too much And so tonight, I need to walk 3 Almost|Drift Away

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